I’m not quite sure why, but I always seem to forget just how cool Keyhole Canyon really is. It’s one of Zion’s narrowest canyons. It’s short & sweet and this spectacular slot is literally a stone’s throw from the road. So why do I always overlook it when considering a short day outing in Utah’s first national park?
Perhaps it’s just too convenient, or at least it once was… Maybe I’m stuck in the past, in a time when a run through the narrow walls of the Keyhole could be accomplished without logging onto a computer. With the hassle of navigating the modern reservation and permit system, I have largely forgotten this place.
Luckily, some of my friends don’t forget about it… & occasionally, they invite me to run through it with them… & each time I run that canyon, I remember the good ole days…
Back when it seemed we were the only people running canyons in Zion National Park.
Guide to Zion
I’ve been running the Keyhole for more than 20 years. Back in the early 2000s, before the masses began to descend upon the park in search of the perfect IG image, I would often run this thing in tandem with Pine Creek Canyon before work, which began at the early hour of 4pm.
During those years, I lived in my van (way before anybody thought it was cool), sharing a small stretch of riverside sand and cottonwood trees with a group of dirtbag rock climbers and drifters from all over the world. Our home was called Mosquito Cove, although I never once recall being bitten by mosquito. This hedonistic haven was located down by the Virgin River, about 5 miles outside the gates of Zion National Park.
We were an active bunch for the most part, and our days were usually filled with adventures in the park. That’s why we were there after all. Mornings typically began with a trip to the only coffee purveyor within 50 miles, the Mean Bean Coffee Shop, right there in the middle of downtown Springdale, a small gateway town at the entrance of Zion Canyon.
Today, this site is home to the popular and modernistic Deep Creek Coffee Shop, but back then, a tiny little one-room coffee shop sat on a quiet gravel side street. A tiny little burger shack was located across the street (Oscars), a tiny little family-run grocery store on the other side of the main street (Sol Foods), and a large field with a few handsome horses standing in the shade of a massive cottonwood tree across the street to the south (no more horses, but you can get pizza & a number of other not-so-modestly priced items… Oh, and I do believe the tree is still there).
To be clear, we all needed coffee, (& a restroom) and Mean Joe Bean served it up right. Locals paid one dollar a cup for quality coffee, with unlimited refills. An added luxury was that Joe, the proprietor of this fine establishment, made sure to always keep a few packs of matches atop the toilet in the restroom. Vans didn’t have composting toilets back then…
Of course, we all knew that an additional price was paid in the form of accepting jabbing, often witty, personal insults dealt out by Joe. It was all cool, as Joe was jolly good fun, and we all enjoyed the deprecating morning humor, often served at a buddies’ expense. Rarely did one get offended in this setting… This wasn’t really the sort of crowd to get offended in the first place.
Now, this Mean Bean place was sort of the cultural center of Zion at the time. If you came to town, you could cruise into the coffee shop, meet the locals and score some beta on climbing or canyoneering in the park. With any luck at all, an inquisitive visitor could probably make a few friends with whom he or she could enjoy a day’s adventure. Countless epic climbs and canyoneering trips were hatched from the Mean Bean’s patio… and my crew were as regular as potted plants there at the shop.
A typical Mean Bean morning would witness a number of conversations ranging from the drunken exploits of one of the group, to politics, to climbing or biking, to new women in town, to park policy or local drama… But somewhere near the end of these vocal engagements was a common thread… “what you got goin’ on today?”
I hate to admit it, but back then, we sort of took it for granted that we could come up with a plan on the spot and see it through that day. Imagine a world where your group could decide upon a plan, grab a hassle-free permit for $5 from the Zion Backcountry Desk and immediately embark on a journey that many folks now begin to plan a year or more in advance. And we did it… Every. Single. Day.
Typically, if I had to work, I’d be up for something light, such as Keyhole, or Pine Creek Canyon, which runs parallel to the Mt Carmel Tunnel. Many times, we’d just do both, because it was just too damned easy. If you’re already up there, you may as well.
The biggest obstacle to completing this adventure on a workday was that traffic was often held up at the tunnel by a large RV. Vehicles must stop and wait for the passage of RVs, as the height limitations along the sides of the tunnel force taller vehicles into the middle of the tunnel, which requires the stoppage of oncoming traffic. We’d actually bitch about that, but the issue of securing a permit was never a problem.
In fact, just a couple of years prior to my arrival in Zion, there was no permit needed at all. Canyoneers would simply drop into whatever canyon they pleased, and just go for it. The 1990s were the official end to the Wild West of Zion National Park. I got there in the year 2000, just a bit too late, but I’m super thankful to have enjoyed quite a few seasons of relatively stress-free roaming in this land of red rock canyons.
I truly hate the process of landing a permit in our national parks these days. A rational part of my mind understands the issue of overcrowding, especially in a slot canyon, where a massive backup of people can mean the death of everyone in a flash flood scenario. But why in the name of everything that is holy are we allowing a private, for-profit corporation to operate the reservation systems for our most sacred public lands?
I find it appalling that access to our national parks has become shackled by the almighty dollar. I hate the bureaucratic process & the fact that a massive corporate entity now realizes great financial gains from the backcountry permitting process. That’s why I all-to-often skip the Keyhole, Pine Creek, the Subway & a number of other adventures that require online reservations. I still get permits occasionally, but if I do, I just go to the backcountry desk and hope for the best. Works sometimes…
But more often than not these days, if Park Junkie wants to run a canyon, I either go with someone who has already dealt with the scammers over at Rec dot Gov, or I just run one of the numerous canyons that lie outside the boundaries of Zion National Park. There are countless canyons in southern Utah…
I’m not necessarily opposed to the permit system, just the corporate side of it. The National Park Service used to be in charge of this permit stuff, and they seemed capable of handling the public demand for these things.
Despite the NPS’s contract with the public to hold these lands “For the Benefit and Enjoyment of the People”, it’s all ran by a corporate oligarchy now. The NPS has quietly handed it off to a group of financial wizards who shower their shareholders with returns, as nearly every backcountry site in the entire country can now be reserved through their fancy little web portal. Damn the interwebs…
Luckily for me, my good buddy Alex asked me if I wanted to run the Keyhole just last week. He has some family coming to visit, and wanted to take them on just such a mission. He was however, wisely concerned that they may not find it as enjoyable as we do and wanted a recon to remind him of the physical demand necessary for this journey.
Don’t ask me why, but some folks just don’t fancy banging their knees and rubbing the skin off of their elbows on gritty sandstone in the murky waters of a desert slot canyon, in which danger lurks around each bend. So, we ran the canyon as a recon mission for Alex, as he had already went through the process of obtaining the online permit. In the end, it seems he may opt to take the family on a more stable trail, something flat and paved perhaps. There are such options in Zion you know…
That said, some of us do enjoy that banging knee & scraping elbow stuff… And for us, the Keyhole is incredible. I really do regain an appreciation for it each time I run through there. I’ve probably ran that thing at least 50 times, and its always more fun than I remember.
Same with Pine Creek… which reminds me… I need to find a friend who has an extra spot on a Pine Creek Permit in the coming weeks… 🤔
Guide to Zion
Relevant Links
National Park Guides
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